When He Hits You, It Is Not Love

She sat across from me holding her bag tightly in her lap. She had foundation on her arm.

"But he always apologises," she said. "He cries after. He says he doesn't know what came over him."

The apology is part of the cycle. It is not proof that it won't happen again. It is part of why it happens again.

The Cycle of Abuse

There is a pattern in abusive relationships: tension builds, the incident occurs, the honeymoon phase follows — tearful apologies, gifts, promises that feel sincere. And then the tension begins to build again.

The honeymoon phase is not redemption. It is reset.

Why Women Stay

Women stay because of children. Because of finances. Because of family pressure. Because he controls their access to money. Because he has isolated them from the people who could help.

What I Want You to Know

Love does not leave marks on your body. Love does not make you afraid in your own home. You deserve to be safe. That is not a high standard. That is the minimum.

If you are in an abusive situation and need to speak to someone, please reach out. Our sessions are confidential.